Phrases You Email When You’re Trying To Get That Internship

Saw this far too real post on McSweeney’s called ‘Let me translate my emails for you’. Highlights:

“I’m just checking in.” = Where is that thing you promised I’d have by now?

“Sorry to bother you again.” = Why can’t you do your fucking job?

“Sorry if I somehow missed your email.” = We both know you never emailed me.

There is probably no really polite way to harass HR departments to give/confirm an internship for you. But these are a couple of handy euphemisms that will at least let your passive aggressive side out.

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